This is: a really nice sock.
It's marketed as a really nice sock - really really really nice. Most people don't believe that they are as nice as the commercial says they are. "They will cure your ailments! They will alleviate your back pain! They will change your life!" Most people are wrong, they do. The secret is the miracle technology woven into the fabric, run by electricity picked up via static - be in by walking through the carpet on a lazy Sunday afternoon, or in the dryer spin cycle. The secret is the "sockastior" (they have a horrible marketing department.)
Connections:
Posession of: Mr. Stetson.
Posession of: Harold Jensen.